Are you in a state?

If so, what kind of state?  In NLP, a state is where you are psychologically/emotionally at the moment: what you’re thinking and experiencing; how you’re feeling.  There are two sides to this particular coin: positive and negative.

Ask around, and a very common state you’ll hear about is “overwhelmed” or “drowning”.  You feel smothered by a variety of workplace demands, some of which also clash with your personal lives.  You live life reactively, firefighting most of the time, lurching from one demand to another, so that sometimes it feels like you’re barely breathing.  Sound familiar?

Get clarity
If we assume that feeling as though you are drowning might be an undesirable state, and you would like to feel differently, what could you do? I decided to experiment. Working one-to-one with a colleague, I got her to think about how she felt about the “drowning” state.  We explored this quite carefully, objectively looking at her state from different angles: curiosity, interest, in order for her to become more disassociated with the original state.  This technique immediately took her one step away from her feelings, and allowed her to become more objective.

Get Purposeful
Together, we explored how she would prefer to feel, using positive language, so not, “I don’t want to feel as if I’m drowning”; rather, “I want to feel relaxed and to think clearly”.  We explored how she might feel in this alternative state, and made it really kinaesthetic, focusing on relaxing the muscles around the face, neck and shoulders most commonly associated with tension. Finally, we ran though a short series of deep relaxation/hypnosis techniques. At the end, she felt positive, calm and energised and in a better place to tackle the issues that had previously seemed so overwhelming.

Self-hypnosis, or relaxation techniques are extremely useful when you’re feeling overwhelmed or your thinking is clouded by pressure and stress.  And it only takes a couple of minutes, so don’t say you don’t have time.  Remember, that kind of thinking is what got you in the state to begin with!

Clear and purposeful  is  a great combination, as my colleague will confirm.  A good life coach will be able to take you through some simple relaxation techniques so that you can use them regularly yourself.

Now, all you need to do is package that state, and sell it.  I wonder what a variety of clear and purposeful ice-cream or chocolate would taste like?  I reckon it would be a best-seller!

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About Marianna Beckwith